Category Archives: childhood terror

The Origins of a Crippling Fear

I was talking to my supervisor this morning. She went on a family camping trip over the weekend and now is sore. Her family had struck out from their campsite, exploring the nature preserve and saw some interesting land formations, … Continue reading

Posted in Adventure!, anxiety, Borderline Personality Disorder, BPD, childhood terror, Fat Shaming, fear, getting old, growing up, my father, regret, social anxiety, Wonder Years | Tagged , , , , , , | 3 Comments

For a Moment to be Ourselves

Last night, the madness group (or ‘mental health’ group if you prefer) staged an Open Mic Night where several people including four very talented teenagers, shared their personal stories. This was part of an overall effort to allow these voices … Continue reading

Posted in Borderline Personality Disorder, BPD, childhood terror, ImNotAshamed, Mad Pride, paranoia, Poetry, regret, shame, society, stigma, work | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

The Mystery of my Childhood OCD

There’s a part of my childhood I don’t talk about much, but I always wonder about it. My major diagnosis is Borderline Personality Disorder. After a lifetime of misdiagnosis, I can accept that and work to mitigate what it does … Continue reading

Posted in anxiety, Borderline Personality Disorder, BPD, childhood terror, existential dread, fear, growing up, hyper-vigilance, OCD | Tagged , | 1 Comment

A funny thing happened on the way to the communion rail. . .

I officially received my First Holy Communion (Catholic capitals) on April 17, 1971. I unofficially received it a few months earlier. And my mother damn near killed my dad over it. First, my mom was a cradle Catholic and a … Continue reading

Posted in Borderline Personality Disorder, BPD, Catholic school, Catholicism, childhood terror, faith, fear, growing up, mental health, mom, my father, shame, When we were very young | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Blessed

We received another one of those nice photographs of a family we used to know in another state out west. I had to admit they are a fine-looking bunch – mom and dad, preternaturally young looking despite their middle age, … Continue reading

Posted in abuse, Amazon, Borderline Personality Disorder, BPD, Catholicism, childhood terror, Christianity, Christmas, holidays, meds, mental health, parents, peace, PTSD, shame, stigma | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

The Voices from our Past: latest column from The Mighty

TODAY Why I Still Carry the Words of My Abusive Father as Someone With Borderline Personality Disorder Keith Gottschalk Contributor • 2 followers Follow Me Borderline Personality Disorder 87K followers Following ✓ Be firstBe first Stupid. Whiny. Spoiled. Lazy. For … Continue reading

Posted in Borderline Personality Disorder, BPD, bullying, childhood terror, children, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, fear, growing up, men, middle age, my father, parents, shame, stigma, The Mighty | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Requiem for my Borderline Brothers and Sisters

Since my diagnosis, I’ve tried to figure out two things based on reading and personal experience. The first is the origin of my Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). For most people, the origins are in traumatic incidents, most often in childhood. This … Continue reading

Posted in abuse, Borderline Personality Disorder, BPD, bullying, Catholic school, childhood terror, children, counseling, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, mental health, my father, parenting, shame, stigma, suicide, violence, When we were very young | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments