Category Archives: existential dread

Brain Weasels Attack!

Editor’s Note: I really can be quite humorous at times but lately, as you might have noticed, things have not been going well at all. I write the way I feel and I write, not on a schedule, but when … Continue reading

Posted in birthday, Borderline Personality Disorder, counseling, existential dread, growing up, meds, men, mom, my father, parenting, parents, PTSD, violence | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

If

I have a lot on my mind today. Although I have been working out and lost weight, I am experiencing periods of lightheadedness and shortness of breath doing light work, like waxing the car. I have a doctor’s appointment Monday. … Continue reading

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Drowning slowly

Brain fog. Depression. Tiredness. All part of my world for the last 48 hours. I take the same pills every day. I go through the same routines every day. I have been working out and for a while, the endorphins … Continue reading

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An open letter to my dead father

Trigger warning: lots of them; read at your own risk. That young boy without a name anywhere I’d know his face.  In this city the kid’s my favorite.  I’ve seen him. I see him every day.  Seen him run outside … Continue reading

Posted in abuse, anxiety, bipolar, Catholic school, childhood terror, existential dread, growing up, mom, my father, parenting, parents | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Solitary Man

There’s a movement that’s been active for a number of years to get rid of solitary confinement. There are prisoners in America that are put in solitary for years and years. Eventually they go mad. This is not a secret … Continue reading

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Notes from the Schlub

Ah, a book I need What do you do when you think your life is somewhat on borrowed time? The WaPo reports this morning that Jared Kushner is being give wide powers to restructure the Federal government with their first … Continue reading

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No happy endings

I was able to get out of bed this morning which will probably be my accomplishment of the day. I didn’t want to. For the first time in my life, I knew I could, and wanted to, lay there all … Continue reading

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